After All That Chaos, What Remains Is Kindness : Zamrooda Khanday

My friend is highly educated, holds a high paying job; is the mother of two beautiful children within a stable marriage. She and her partner earn enough and more for them to live an extremely lavish life. They discuss retiring many times and taking it easy. Yet each time the discussion remains a discussion and they continue to work harder to get more secure in life. I am never surprised that these discussions didn’t materialise into any actions as I am aware of the fear that she is living with. 

The fear of displacement, the fear of losing what they had made/earned in life, the fear of being woken up one night and asked to leave your home & country and migrate to a new place leaving everything behind.

It’s been 30 years and the struggle continues. She will not allow herself or her family to stop working for the fear that enough is not enough. In a moment life can change and she needs to be prepared for that one moment. This is not just one anecdote but the reality of numerous crisis and conflict led regions in the world.

The loss of not just material, but human life and values show us the darker side of these conflicts. Tracking down the reasons for this displacement gives us multitudes of differences- it is usually based out of a majority-minority debate and continues to consume the larger society. Displaced people’s number has risen to above 100 million for the first time ever.

PTSD is found to be the highest amongst the survivors of war no matter where they live. They are often seen to be hesitant talking about the trauma. It’s almost believed as though they will relive it, if they allow themselves to voice it. Each refugee has a story to tell yet the narrative does not change. 

Belongingness is another concern to be highlighted here. In conflict hit areas, fear of displacement contributes towards lack of belongingness. Hence, to feel at home or safe is something to be grappled with. A prompt solution and a concrete measure to bring back unity and peace is kindness- to be able to be compassionate and considerate towards the fact that we all fare through it, together! 

Acts of kindness brings back the classic feeling of community, care and awareness. For areas & people with war cries and conflicts, gestures like humanitarian aid, grocery campaigns, fundraisers and sending help are some examples that bring back one’s belief in kindness. It also strengthens the feeling of belongingness in various communities. 

After all, Kindness heroes through times of crisis are always fondly remembered! 

Here is an excerpt from a letter that a grandson wrote to his grandmother clearly showing the belief system of the generations to come on how they deal with displacement and belongingness: 

“I cannot imagine what it must have felt like to be told that you were no longer wanted, uprooted from your own home for being who you are and that you must leave the country where you have lived and had a son with nothing but a suitcase full of clothes. 

Listening to our family’s story, your story, had an immense effect on my life. It was a story that I had never known until I sat around your dinner table back in 2017, interviewing you for my school project. It is the reason why I am doing the work I do today. It has led me to better understand my identity and made me appreciate the importance of living life to the fullest every single day. You told the story so honestly and with conviction, making it one of strength, not sadness, and it is an evening I will never forget. “

As much as the tyranny and grief are part of conflict, so are the war heroes who believe in peace no matter what. There has not been a single war  that has not seen a deed of kindness. More than often we tend to remember the wars by these brave acts. Survivors often talk about these experiences over the actual experience of tyranny. History has over and again celebrated the champions of kindness during the armed conflict. 

Here are some suggestions on how we can ensure that we keep kindness intact in us in such trying times:

  1. Read from the right sources & stay aware and informed of all circumstances around the world 
  2. Always contribute to send help through donations or crowdfunding
  3. Don’t take any extremes or side with the tyrant. Prioritise humanity and saving lives.
  4. Always keep the war heroes and kindness heroes in your wishes to achieve peace & unity! 

Together, we can make the world a kinder place in these trying times. Let’s not stay silent or shut our minds towards such conflict and get through the crisis solely on humanitarian grounds! 

aidbees is striving every day to see a kinder world. On their platform, the company is offering a one-stop solution for “kindness,” which is definitely the need of the hour. Beginning to do one kind act every day will inculcate kindness within our hearts naturally, and we can be looking to do that through aidbees. Come join us in the journey of making a kinder world!

Click here to read more stories of change, awareness, inspiration and practising  kindness!

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